Tyler excursion, day 1: State park.

Not long after the last bell rang to start our summer break, we were all itching to get out of town. Combine that with my need to see my parents' gravesite, and we had ourselves a quick trip to my hometown.

Before going into town, though, we spent the day at Tyler State Park, a pretty little recreation area. My parents were not all that outdoorsy, but the few times we pretended to be the camping type, we stayed in the state park's screened shelters. More frequently, my parents brought me here to swim or picnic, often with out-of-town relatives. I can remember laughing with my aunts, uncles and a cousin or two while gathered around one of the wooden tables here. Our church youth group had camp-outs and cook-outs here, and one year, my Girl Scout troop did an overnight stay.

In spite of all my history with this place, it'd been nearly 30 years since my last visit here. It's crazy that in all of our Tyler trips, Brett, Ryan and Katie had never experienced our state park. Better late than never, right?

First stop: a picnic area near this fishing pier.

View of the park store, bath house and swimming area

Love those pine trees!

It was nice to find a table so close to the water. We're no strangers to these on-the-road picnics. In fact, on our typical (much longer) road trips, our tradition is to load down a cooler with sandwich fixin's and have a bunch of snack foods on hand. Apparently I'm out of "road shape" because I forgot the tablecloth. Oops. At least I remembered the Pringles! Pringles have become our go-to staple for picnics since those cans hold up much better than bags of chips.

Dining companion

We decided this would be the perfect setting for a horror film.
Creepy screens, lots of bugs and no doors on the stalls?
Yeah. TERRIFYING.

After chowing down, we began our 2.1-mile hike around the lake. I remember walking this same trail years ago when our Girl Scout troop camped here.

This trail is labeled "easy," and it would be for anyone not as clumsy as I am! Just a few weeks after falling in the school parking lot, I took a nice little spill here. This time, at least, I fell over a wicked tree root and not a tiny pebble. Embarrassing!

This log was loaded with turtles—
until they heard us approach, anyway.
We figure this big guy was too deaf
to hear us or too big to move!

The trees provide a nice canopy for most of the trail. It was a warm day, but in the shade, the heat was bearable. Still, we had this trail mostly to ourselves on this, the warmest day of the season so far. (Near the end of our walk, we were in full-on overheated, sweat-dripping-in-the-eyes, I'm-gonna-die-if-I-can't-find-some-shade mode. but at least we didn't start that way.)

My nature buff LOVES hiking, and he was quick to spot cool natural wonders, like this branch/large vine that ran most of this tall tree's length.

Tarzan yell not included.

Beaver pond

Ryan spotted this teeny-tiny frog.

We're talking TEE-NINY. 

My loves

And another, this time wider shot of my loves
(Brett's smile in this one cracks me up!)

Nice view of the bath house and swimming area

Not sure if he's Zacchaeus or a monkey.

By this point in the hike, I was MELTING.
Brett and Katie were cool enough to enjoy
this little peninsula, but I stuck to the shade.

After our hike we cooled off with some A/C and ice cream from the park store. Then it was swimming time! We had a blast just floating around and skipping Katie's new "wave-runner" ball across the water.

With our picnic, hike and swim complete, we were ready to pack it in. One of the nice things about Tyler State Park is its abundance of tent sites and all those screened shelters, but for our overnight stay, we opted for Comfort Suites! I am my mother's daughter, after all.

Golden.

Fifty years ago today, my parents were joined in holy matrimony at San Marcos' Calvary Baptist Church. Mom was 19 at the time; Daddy was an "old man" of 20.

Even though as young adults they probably didn't know what they were getting into, they both honored the vows they took that Sunday afternoon. When they said "in sickness and in health," they meant it. "For better or worse"? Meant it. "'Til death do us part"? Yes, indeed.

Daddy died just a few months shy of their 30th wedding anniversary, and Mom missed him profoundly for the rest of her days. She always tried to plan distractions for herself on Sept. 6 (his birthday), April 1 (the anniversary of his death), and June 2, their day. While I tried to support her on those occasions, June 2nd was the one day that I felt I could offer her little comfort.

I hate that we're not throwing my parents a big anniversary party to celebrate, but even so, today isn't as painful as some of the other milestones have been. June 2nd was always their day, and this year, for the first time since 1992, I know my mom is spending her wedding anniversary free from pain and sadness. She is experiencing nothing but joy, pure joy.

My mom and dad kept their promises, and better yet, our Father does, too.

June 2, 1963, was just the beginning of an incredible love story. So on the 50th anniversary of that wonderful day, here's to love, here's to commitment, and here's to Jim and Nancy.

From their wedding album, the big day:

The bride

The groom and his ushers

Mom with her brother (who gave her away)

Think Daddy's a little nervous?

The wedding party. Mom's sister Sherrell was her matron of honor.

And pages/photos commemorating their engagement: 

Mom and Dad with some of their married friends

The engagement announcement

Shower notice

The invitation

A letter from Daddy's Uncle John,
who ended up officiating the ceremony.

Their first home:

The album pages and photos may be yellowing, but my parents' example of marriage will never fade. What a blessing!

Daisypalooza.

Just a sampling of the many videos we've shot since Daisy joined the family!

May 18:




 May 19:

 



May 21:








May 22:





May 23 (filmed just minutes after I posted a photo of a conked-out puppy):

It's a GIRL!

Yes, our family has grown—by 4 feet! Meet Miss Daisy Jean Dub:

Born: Good Friday, March 29, 2013
Arrived at her "furever" home: May 17, 2013

She came to our home May 17, and within minutes, we had all fallen head-over-heels in love with her! She's named Daisy in a nod to The Great Gatsby (although I hope she won't be quite as superficial as the privileged Mrs. Buchanan) and because she is as dainty as the little white flower.

While our sudden adoption surprised some, adding to our fur family was something we'd been talking about for several months. Frisco, while a much-loved part of our family for the past five years, is very much Brett's dog. Part blue heeler, part lab (we think), she's overly rambunctious and nearly impossible for anybody but Brett to walk or play with. (Or as Brett would say, her only problem is that "she loves too much.") We wanted to get a smaller dog, always thinking we would visit a local shelter to rescue a dog there. Taking in a puppy was never a consideration.

Well, at least not until we saw THIS:

Some friends posted this photo on Facebook in an attempt to find homes for their dogs' puppies. Holy cow, did it WORK! I had seen their post a day or two before, and even mentioned to Brett that our friends had puppies to give away, but once I saw the photo? Hook, line and sinker.

Brett picked up our little angel on that Thursday, which happened to be the day of Senior Boards at school. Because of that, I had to work late, which almost killed me! I could not wait to hold our baby. We hadn't told the kids about the puppy, so I wasn't there to see their surprise. I did get to see the picture they posted that afternoon once they got home from school:

Fortunately, I survived Senior Project and my growing anticipation and made it home to meet our sweetheart.

"The circle of LIIIIIIIIIFE..."

After our quick meet-and-greet, we were off to RHS for Katie's band concert. Later that night, though, we were back to bonding. Daisy helped us watch The Office finale:

In the days since, we have had a blast filling our phones with photos and videos of our sweet girl. I'm sure I'm losing Facebook friends left and right with my "Daily Daisy" posts. But can you blame me for the Daisy overdose?

Daisy's father is a miniature schnauzer, and her mom is part schnauzer. We're really curious to see how much she'll grow. Right now, at eight weeks old, she's so tiny! As Brett says, "She's barely there!" 

Many have asked how Frisco's doing with her new sister. So far, so good! In fact, we've been surprised to see how much Daisy's presence has calmed our big, hyper dog. At first we were afraid Frisco was depressed, but after watching her with the puppy, we think she's enjoying her companionship. She's super sweet to her, not seeming to mind when the little one gets crazy going after the food bowl.

ChaCha is living up to the cat stereotype, wanting nothing to do with Daisy. But you know, it only took her four years to warm up to Frisco, so maybe she and DJ will be pals someday.

We're so happy to have little Daisy in our family. She seems to be fitting right in, happy to play, eat, nap, eat and eat and eat some more.

Maybe she loves the food bowl a bit too much?

Yep, our girl's a MESS!

(Be sure to check out the Daisypalooza video post, too!)

Twenty years.

Twenty years ago today, Daddy died.

In some ways it's crazy to think he's been gone that long (two decades!), but when I consider all that's happened since, I can believe it. When he died, Bill Clinton was president, our car phone resided in a bulky black bag, and I was still more than a year away from having one of those fancy-pants dial-up modems. He died before Brett and I got married, before Ryan and Katie were born, before mortgages and migraines. So yes, 20 years seems about right in that sense.

But since August 22, I have felt his loss more acutely. Losing Mom has meant reliving the grief we felt in those first few years after he died. Plus, she wore his memory on her sleeve. I couldn't look at her without seeing her partner, her soulmate. Going through Mom's belongings has also helped to stir up memories of my sweet father.

One particular item I found is a notepad. On it, in my father's handwriting, is his brief autobiography. He wrote it around 1982; I was 14. I plan to transcribe it all eventually, but for now, here's an excerpt. These are Daddy's words:


~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~


Everywhere I have lived I have had to cope with bruises, aches, and pains. Bleeding in my joints has caused them to become stiff. Hardly a day goes by that I do not experience severe pain. These experiences throughout my life affect the way I respond to others. I can empathize with those who suffer pain. I can understand how those with various disabilities must feel rejection.

Nancy and I have been blessed with a beautiful daughter... We have appreciated what each year brings with her. I know that my being a hemophiliac is a source of concern and sometimes embarrassment to her. It hurts me when I have to tell her again and again, "My leg is sore," or "My arms are sore." She deserves a physically well father.

Nancy and Charis both make living so much easier. I am a businessman, and I must work many times when I physically can hardly move. My wife and daughter encourage me. They help me with my IVs at home, thus avoiding exorbitant hospital visits.

My inability to perform in the same way other fathers do causes Charis to sometimes wish I was more healthy. I'm sure that many of her feelings are a secret known only to her.

As a father and husband, I try to provide well for my family. I would never want anyone to feel I am incapable of providing for my family. Sympathy I do not need. I understand and know well my limitations. I have to the best of my ability learned to live with them.

I owe so much to so many. Above all, God has continued to bless me and gives me so many opportunities every day. I will continue to serve Him regardless of the state of health I may possess.

My parents mean so much to me. Although they sometimes worry themselves unnecessarily about my welfare, they have always stood by me and us. They have been so supportive in my efforts to succeed.

Nancy will always stand taller than any other person living. She knew what she was getting into when we married. She has put up with all of my shortcomings. When I have a bleeding difficulty, she no doubt has more answers than anyone else. She trained herself in our home-infusion program. She has lost many nights of sleep because I was in such pain that I could not lie still. On and on I could go, telling of her merits. She is so supportive when others try to talk down to me. My work as a minister is definitely enhanced by a wife like her.

Our daughter, Charis, means more to us than words can express. Being 14 years old, she is academically gifted. I'm proud of her and enjoy telling others of her achievements. I look forward to her completing college and giving me a son-in-law. I believe she will be a spiritually enlightened person. Her mother and I have tried to give her the spiritual guidance she needs.

So many friends have been uplifting at times when I reached lows in the valleys of emotional welfare, too numerous to mention. Let it suffice to say that with friends to lean on, there would have been many times I do not believe I could have continued on.

Hemophilia is not a fun disease. It is one you can truly live with. You watch carefully each moment you live. You will not live recklessly or carelessly, but you do whatever you feel you can.

I have overcome many obstacles. The odds were against me. Today's modern technology gives hemophiliacs even more hope. I overcame; others will, too.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

I'll never tire of hearing Daddy's voice, and through these words, I can hear him. What a blessing! I'm so proud of the way he coped with adversity and pain. I'm thankful for the way he affirms Mom and me here, too. But when he writes that I deserved a "physically well father"? He should know that I did not "deserve" him; he was a far greater father than anyone could ever merit. Oh sure, he drove me crazy, but I'm overwhelmed with gratitude when I think of all he did for me.


Please excuse the back-to-back maudlin posts! It ain't all about the grief over here, but these last few days have merited a little extra writing, a.k.a. "cheap therapy."

Other Daddy posts:
The 2008 tribute (my favorite)
A celebration of fathers (Father's Day 2010)

"A Sketch of Jim" (my grandmother's account of Daddy's childhood)